To Xu Ziyao - Part 1
Today is the Qixi Festival. For some reason, the night sky, on this day, is always unusually bright, and with the plain moonlight pouring on the surface, it’s quiet.
Only my breathing can be heard.
I am listening to the Cowherd and Weaver Girl’s sweet words under the grape trellis in the yard. You must be laughing at me again and calling me stupid.
I still remember the day when I first saw you nine years ago.
I went to the next class to find Chuxia, and when I arrived at the window, where I often used to call her, I saw you who I had never seen before.
The sun shined on your side face through the glass window, making me captivated and enthralled. Just when I stared at you in a daze, you suddenly turned your head and startled me a little, then you showed me a warm smile, just like the warm winter sun, warming my whole heart.
At the age of seventeen, I learned for the first time what a heartbeat felt like.
Your smile made my heart flutter.
My hand opened the window unconsciously and habitually, and I said to you as smoothly as possible: “I am looking for Chuxia.”
You laughed and said, “I just transferred and I don’t know my new classmates yet.”
Of course, no wonder I had never seen you.
At that time, I saw Chuxia and rushed out to her and pulled her aside to talk. I had forgotten the original intention of looking for her because you had successfully captured my attention.
I asked Chuxia: “What is the name of the new boy who transferred to your class?”
Chuxia smirked and asked me if I was interested in you. I was feeling guilty and said no, and that I was just curious about your name.
She stopped teasing me, “Xu Ziyao.” She said.
Now I understand that if you like a person, everything about him is beautiful, even his name is pleasant to the ear.
Later on, I went to see Chuxia more frequently, to see you under the pretense of looking for her, even if I could only glance at you secretly, I was satisfied.
One day, as soon as I arrived at the window, you opened the window one step faster, took a lollipop and shook it in front of my eyes, and asked: “Would you like to eat it?”
I was stunned. That was the first time you have taken the initiative to talk with me. It turns out that every time I opened the window, I called you out: “Xu Ziyao, help me call Chuxia!”
In fact, my voice is loud enough for Chuxia to hear it without you saying it. I just wanted to call you again. I just wanted to call your name.
Seeing my face, which looked as if I had seen a ghost, you turned your lips down in complaint muttering, “Just don’t talk, I will eat it myself.”
When you opened the wrapper and were about to stuff it in your mouth, the lollipop was snatched by me. And it entered my mouth at lightning speed.
You laughed, and the clear laughter made me lose my soul again, and my heartfelt as sweet as the candy you gave me.
“Looking for Chuxia again?” you asked.
I looked at your handsome face and nodded foolishly.
We were the happiest at that time, Ziyao, I think I will never encounter such a good time and people in this life.
I always miss the past. The ups and downs that I had experienced with you are still vivid, I think I can’t forget you.
Since the lollipop incident, we had become more and more familiar, and every time I came into contact with you, my thought process became slow. I don’t know if it’s because of you that I had forgotten to think.
Your grades were so good that even someone who sits firmly on the top of the throne, Chuxia, was dismissed by you, which made the young girls admire you.
Even Chuxia couldn’t stop praising you. You know, this best friend of mine is a really arrogant girl and seldom praised others, and the first person I heard her praise was you, Xu Ziyao.
You often gave me snacks, such as lollipops, chocolates, etc. Of course, I loved these foods very much, but the important part was that they were from you. So I loved it more.
You would go with me and Chuxia and because Chuxia’s home came first, so you and I were the only ones at the end every time. The time I walked that section of the road used to be what I looked forward to most every day, and I would never ask for it anymore.
On that part of the road that was neither long nor short, you used to hold my hand shyly, I still remember when you first tried to hold my hand, you only touched me and your fingertips retracted again.
But I didn’t do it. I chased my hand and took the initiative to put it in your palm. and said shamelessly: “I have encountered it, you are responsible.”
You burst out in laughter and gently squeezed my hand. And asked: “Ari, can’t you be more reserved?”
I answered you thoughtfully, but I was extremely nervous, for the fear that you would push me back again saying not to hold my hand.
Feeling your hand tightening slowly, and feeling the temperature of your palm passing into my palm, I slowly calmed down and smiled happily.
We started to communicate secretly. Dating was not allowed in high school. Everyone was nervously preparing for the college entrance examination. We were no exception. It’s just that for you and Chuxia lessons were easy, but for me, that wasn’t the case. I always got overwhelmed by my homework. I really wanted to be admitted to the same university as you, but my grades were my biggest concern.
Because of this, you would help me with homework every day after school for one hour. I was afraid that Chuxia would be silly and wait, so I let her go first, but she said that she would go with us.
I didn’t think much about it at the time and readily agreed. But the fact is that she already liked you at that time, you knew vaguely, she knew very clearly, I didn’t know.
I would just listen to you telling me about math and physics problems one after another, and occasionally committing mistakes, staring blankly at you, until you would find out and give me a blast. But we had never noticed that the eyes of Chuxia who sat silently and pretended to read were a little jealous.
I always thought that Chuxia treated you as a good friend like me, but I forgot that the opposite sex attracts each other, besides, you were still such an excellent boy.